“As seen in Hamburger America, the book, on sale here!” proclaims the sign on the counter, directly in front of the dinosaur of a gentleman taking my order. I had heard this guy was a curmudgeon, but it takes one to know one, and he seemed ok to me.
Giant is located on Lower Boones Ferry Rd, on the cusp of the town of Lake Oswego, an uppity vanilla suburb of Portland, Oregon. I won’t tell you the slang name they have for the town, it’s so revolting. Surprising to me that in an hoity-toity burb a burger place good survive, but it’s been around a good long while, and appears to do a bustling lunch biz. In fact biz must be REALLY good, because there were two matching Escalades out back, which I assume belong to the owners, and weren’t just randomly parked there.
This building shape, I have seen this in various locations around Oregon, it must have been a chain at one time, but nobody asked knew, and not being a native, I have no knowledge of it either. Perhaps it was just because some “architect” got lucky.
In any case, this place regularly tops various local surveys for ‘best burger”, so I had to see what all the hubbub was about.
And what was the hubbub all about? Nada. Although another website purports Giant’s burgers are “extra-lean ground Black Angus beef brought in fresh daily,”” you couldn’t tell by me. Strip away the vegetables, condiments, and just like the highly (mis)acclaimed “In N Out”, you have a rather thin, ordinary, unseasoned beef patty.
The “Giant” may well refer to the buns, as they are over-sized, fresh, and sesame topped. They are served toasted, and mine had a “little something extra”, in that the top of the bun was scorched, and as such, I tossed it, but that’s ok, I’m trying to cut down on carbs, anyway.
I had the bacon cheeseburger, and a small fries, coming in at a flat six bucks. The bacon and cheese were fine, but again, nothing out of the ordinary. Chomp into the loaded burger (don’t you DARE ask for it to be customized to your liking), and what you get is your taste buds awash with red onion and mayo.
The fries were larger than shoestrings, smaller than dinner fries, and come completely unseasoned. Bowls of foil packets of ketchup adorn each table top.
One of the draws, apparently, is a special burger they call “The Filler”, which I might go back and try when I have a larger appetite day. It’s made up of two patties topped with bacon, ham, a large egg, tomato, lettuce, cheese, pickle and onion on a sesame seed bun. Now that sounds right. No mention of mayo, thank god.
On the same street, within a mile in either direction, you have a plethora of fast and casual food places. You’ll do just as well to stop at any of them rather than seek out Giant.
As far as bacon cheeseburgers in SW PDX, one would be better off at Humdinger on Barbur, or George’s Giant Burgers down 99w. BTW, Giant is “cash only.”
