Barbies Primo Burgers Review, Mojave, CA

(From our travel archives) Saw a billboard for this place, and as it was the right time of day, pulled into Mojave (pop. 3763) to give it a try.  Mojave is an interesting place.  Middle of nowhere, far north end of Edwards Air Force Base, and home to one of America’s parking lots for misfit airliners.  Planes that have been taken out of service, repossessed, or are just surplus for an airline at the moment.

“Primo” is a word that is used a lot  in Hawaii (just let me verify that at Wiki Dictionary…hold on….). (Actually Italian for ‘first’)  Yep.  It means generally “great”.   So our proprietress Barbie thought she would affix that label to her burgers.

I was anticipating same.  Mom and pop type of place, surely I would be treated to a hand-formed patty, bakery roll, and other delights.

Sadly, nothing could have been farther from the truth.  Primo’s patties are straight out of some institutional freezer, ala Sysco, complete with grill marks and utterly flavorless.  The bun was very dry.  As always, I ordered the burger “undressed” to experience the meat, bread, and cheese flavor.  I never thought a day would come when I would have rued not asking for ketchup, but this was such a day.

Barbie’s serves breakfast, lunch, and dinner, with everything from oatmeal to American and Mexican entrees, and a number of specialty burgers.

Steak, fish, and chicken are on tap, as well as a wide variety of fried things, fries, pickles, zucchini, rings, chili fries, pastrami fries.  No tots, tho.

I tried the onion rings and they weren’t really that bad, they come with a side of ranch (geez, the ranch salad dressing ‘lobby’ has sure become strong!).   The rings were lightly breaded, crispy, hot, but left glimmering pools of grease on the paper plate cover.

Barbie’s might be just the place to fill your belly if you are out here in nowhere ville.   The food is cooked to order,  and the place was very crowded, clearly a local favorite.

It’s just not one of mine.


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Barbies Primo Burgers Review

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