Portland, Or – Red Coach Restaurant

Nestled away in the bowels of an office building, andhard to find if you ain’t looking, the Red Coach is strictly a burger and fries place, open 11- 3:30, Mon-Sat. When I say “strictly burger and fries”, I mean that’s what most people go for, although there are a few other basics on offer (BLT, Grilled Cheese, Chili, Side Salad).

I hit the joint at 130 on a Wednesday, there were only a few remaining lunch rush customers, no one but me on the main floor, a few more in the upper level. I hear tell the Red Coach has been around forever, and the decor (red leather tufted booths), makes it seem so.

A footnote on the back of the menu says the Red Coach beef in Montana Ranch Brand, raised on open rangeland without antibiotics, hormones, and only vegetarian feed.

Red Coach offers two sizes of burgers, weighing in at 1/5th pound, or 1/3rd, I opted for the latter, with bacon and cheese, a side of crinkle cut fries, and a chocolate shake. Shakes come in small or large, you couldn’t get more pure than these ingredients, ice cream, milk, hershey’s syrup. They squeeze a bit of syrup around the inside of the glass for an “artistic flair.” The burgers comes standard with mayo, tomato, and lettuce, which I asked them to leave in the kitchen in favor of pickles and raw onion, which is how they delivered it. Buns were 4 1/2 inchers from Franz, a local baker, who are actually credited with inventing the hamburger bun, as we now know it, in the late 20s.

The fries were nothing special, some food service supplied product, but they were cooked perfectly. The service, for what the place is, and what it isn’t, is “over the top.” Everyone working took an interest in my wellfare.

I was kind of prepared to gripe about the size of the “small shake”, until the counter man came by with the original mix cup and asked if I’d like a little more, and he refilled my glass to the top. I don’t know if that is standard operating procedure, but it sure made me happy. My bacon cheeseburger, fries and shake set me back $14.25, plus tip.

The quality of the pictures? Only had the phone with me today, sorry folks.

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